Four Years

I just wanted to share with you all what I put on my Facebook status today. I can hardly believe that it’s been four years since we had to say goodbye to my Dad too soon. In some ways, it has flown by. In others, particularly this year with the redundancy and my Granddad’s stroke, I felt I have needed him more than ever for his advice and rationality. So, today, as a form of therapy and a way of making the day a bit easier, I put the following as my status:

Four years ago, my family and I lost one of the most important role models of my life. Today, I have donated £50 to Cancer Research UK in memory of my Dad.

I remember once, after university, my Dad told me that he had enjoyed being my parent. That I reminded him of himself when he was growing up as I enjoyed pushing boundaries, I was quite outspoken and opinionated – I know some of you might find that hard to believe… Perhaps one of my not-so-thought-out moments was lying to my Dad about a delayed train back from Chelmsford every so often, when he was at home sitting on the Internet, watching the train times… We used to argue SO much because I am stubborn! And, of course, he was always one step ahead!

Now that I’m older, I have realised I share so many more characteristics with him. I am still opinionated and outspoken but only when I need to be. I know when to keep my mouth shut, and I am quiet and patient when I feel the occasion calls for it – I’ve even been known to just smile and nod! I am hardworking, ambitious and have the drive and determination to get to where I want to be. Ultimately, if you don’t think I’ll do it, I will prove you wrong. I am not judgemental, I am thoughtful and you can rely on me at any time of need, even if it’s for a drink and laugh in the pub. I am my father’s daughter.

This year has been pretty (crappily) unpredictable so far and I have felt like I’ve needed my Dad more than ever but I know that he would be proud of all the rational decisions I’m making and he will be proud of whatever I end up doing.

In the words of Baz Luhrman, “Get to know your parents; you’ll never know when they’ll be gone for good.”

“[This red wine is] full-bodied… Fruity… And pretentious – rather like myself!” ❤

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